2021 In Film

Every year, I take the month of January to catch up on as many of the films I missed throughout the year as I can. This post/list/sleep aid is the result of my annual maniacal start to the new year. And yeah, I realize it’s nearly February but the academy has only begun their own voting process. So shhhhhhhhhhhhut it.

One of the final films on my list to see was Spielberg’s remake of “West Side Story.” This one always seemed like a bad idea. Why remake something widely regarded as a stone cold classic? Now, specifically for me, West Side Story holds a special place in my heart. This was a family film for me growing up. Both my parents were fans and showed the film to my brother and I beginning when we were still pretty young. For my mother to be a fan was no surprise. She liked cool things like Martin Scorsese and David Lynch.

Quick side note: My mother really was my introduction to two of my all-time favorite directors in the two aforementioned gentlemen. As a small kid, I was really into Star Wars. I also loved to read and so my mother figured I’d like Dune. That was my introduction to David Lynch. I didn’t just watch movies, I would also read the boxes in the rental store and study the opening credits. Dune was based on a book and so I immediately had respect for it, lol. It was directed by David Lynch and I knew that was super important because it was the final name listed. Okay, Dune rocked this little kid’s socks and Lynch was on the radar.

I was still too young to really dive into Lynch though, lmao. I remember my parents renting Blue Velvet and me trying to sneak into the hallway to catch some of it because I was most definitely not allowed to watch that one yet myself. Next up was Twin Peaks and I remember my mom being really into the show and though I didn’t understand a lot of what was going on, it was Lynch and the guy from both Dune and Blue Velvet and so I watched some of it too. Those who know me know that in the years since, Lynch has established himself as my all-timer and Twin Peaks rivaled perhaps only by LOST as my favorite piece of visual entertainment ever.

But I digress.

We were discussing 2021 in film and I just whisked us away to the 1980s for two separate tangents. Back to tangent number one. The real kicker was that my father loved West Side Story. “But dad, it’s a musical.” My father was always your prototypical country boy tough guy. He was happiest watching Robert Redford trudge through the snow for three straight hours. He loved Chuck Norris and shit like that.

And…a musical?

Yep.

So West Side Story was the rare treat where the entire family could bond over something we all pretty much equally enjoyed. My skepticism of the remake remained for a long time. Yeah, I know it’s Spielberg and he’s responsible for my favorite film of all-time. Hell, He’s responsible for probably two of my top three films of all-time. Double hell, he’s probably got a half dozen films in my top twenty five. What the hell was I worried about?

Spielberg hasn’t seemed like himself in a long time. A loooooong time. In recent years, it’s felt like he’s either lost the rhythm or the joy. Well, even if it was only for one film, he regained it all back because the West Side Story remake is an absolute triumph.

This triggered another thought: Man, I haven’t seen “The Outsiders” in a long time. And I’m happy to report that in recent years, Coppola has revisited his film and added scenes back in — scenes deemed unnecessary to the runtime when originally released. Adding these scenes back in allows the story to focus on what was always most important: the relationships between these damaged and sensitive boys. It helps show the macho antics as armor and the giant rumble near the end of the film as the useless exercise in toxic masculinity that it always was. If you haven’t seen the film before, or haven’t seen it in a long time, first read the book. Always read the book. But then go ahead and check out “The Complete Novel” version of the film. I think you’ll be glad you did. (The courtroom scene is still hilariously terrible though)

And now, several million words into this manifesto, we have the films of 2021. First off, 2021 electrified me as a film lover way more than 2020 did. These twenty five films I liked quite a bit and there are fifteen more that I’ll add on at the end that I also really enjoyed. There are at least seven films on this list that I love enough to have already purchased on disc or plan to — maybe more. But enough is enough and it’s time for the list.

1. DRIVE MY CAR – This is the most recent film I’ve scene and caused me to completely rewrite everything about this list. (Full disclosure: I always anticipated this though) The moment I read about this film coming out of Cannes, I was in. The trailer was great and it was based on a short story by Haruki Murakami, one of my all-time favorite authors. Still, I was blown away by the humanized beauty of what I saw for three hours the other night. The film is full of moments where humans are human and that’s all. It’s simple and profound. It will make you smile and laugh and cry real, deep, emotional tears. A film about the highs and lows of life and how trying to subdue yourself into the middle road can lead you nowhere. Cigarettes hanging out of the sunroof. Those who’ve seen it know what that means.

2. C’MON C’MON – A film where Joaquin Phoenix plays a documentarian who is tasked with taking care of his young nephew for a few weeks. Until I finally saw Drive My Car, this was firmly at the top of my list. Joaquin Phoenix is everything anyone could ever want in an actor. His range, both intellectual and emotional, is fucking limitless. He is as good an actor as I have ever seen and this may be my favorite ever performance from him. Another film about human beings trying their best to be human beings. And another film that made me weep.

3. THE GREEN KNIGHT – Art. This film is like an interactive art exhibit come to life. Mesmerizing and deeply strange and perfectly told. Every single shot in this one feels like it could hang on the wall of a museum. Seriously dropped my jaw. Dev Patel is one of the most underrated actors working today and I hope he and David Lowery continue making art together.

4. WEST SIDE STORY – My favorite Spielberg film since…I don’t even know? Munich (seriously underrated Spielberg) or Minority Report? Nah, it’s better than those. Saving Private Ryan? Nah, I think I prefer this to that one as well. Schindler’s List? Okay, maybe there’s the line. Still, that was nearly thirty years ago but also marks the moment where I feel like Spielberg became a bit more serious and eventually his worked suffered as the message began to smother the joy of the work. For me, he recaptured nearly all of the joy and cleverness from his 70s and 80s output with West Side Story. It’s only sad to me that it released during a pandemic where a ton of new eyes have yet to find it.

5. THE TRAGEDY OF MACBETH – The best adaptation of this work I have ever seen. Another jaw dropper. Minblowingly beautiful for every single second of it’s runtime. Joel Coen laid waste to anyone even thinking of adapting Shakespeare. Someone asked me: How was Denzel? And I was like: The fuck? I just told you to see this at all costs, that it’s a masterpiece and Denzel fucking Washington is playing Macbeth. How do you think he was?

Okay, I wasn’t quite that mean about it but for real? It’s Denzel and yes he crushes it. CRUSHES it. Also, Corey Hawkins delivers what should be a star making performance in this as Macduff.

6. LICORICE PIZZA – Paul Thomas Anderson has yet to make I film I haven’t dug. I feel like he’s one of those filmmakers whom I occupy the same mental wavelength with. Licorice Pizza is no different. There’s been a ton written about this film already and I disagree with a lot of it. I can see where the criticisms are coming from but I personally feel like the film was aiming at something totally different. I’m not going to get into it all here — maybe later, around late March perhaps? But this was maybe the funniest film of the year. Cooper Hoffman. This was his first film? Alana Haim. This was her first film? Jesus Christ these two had insane chemistry together and total command over every scene. And there’s Bradley Cooper who gave this year’s most hilariously over the top performance. Every single second of Cooper in this is a riot. He damn near steals the entire film in about four scenes. Another future purchase for me.

7. THE POWER OF THE DOG – The first third of this film, I thought Campion had seriously miscast the role of Phil Burbank with Benedict Cumberbatch. Whoops. Jane Campion deserves to win every directing award handed out for her work on this film. I’m glad to see she was nominated by the DGA already. “The Power Of The Dog” unfolds like a really great, challenging book (which it was based on). Campion sets each scene with precision and every actor in the film each give subtle yet profound performances. This one surprised me.

8. NIGHTMARE ALLEY – Bradley Cooper again! I’m a huge fan of Guillermo Del Toro. He’s on that list of: show me nothing just tell me where to be and I’ll see it. Nightmare Alley is like a rotten onion of a movie where each layer gets peeled back to reveal a little bit more of the worst of mankind. It’s marvelous and the most gorgeous movie of the year. Also my favorite film score of the year. Also easily the best final scene of any film this year. Fucking haunting.

9. THE FRENCH DISPATCH – I love Wes Anderson. And this was maybe the most Wes Anderson film Wes Anderson has ever made. It’s almost like he could sense someone was about to make a “Wes Anderson type” film and said to himself: well, allow me to set the bar a little higher. Loved it. Give me more. I hope Bill Murray lives forever.

10. PIG – The surprise of the year for me. I’m a huge fan of Nicolas Cage. He never stops and more importantly he’s never stopped giving a damn about his work. He is always “all-in.” If you’re a filmmaker and just hired Nicolas Cage, you’re getting 100% of him. I have an immense amount of respect for Cage exactly because this is his outlook. He’s amazing. And “Pig” ended up being a completely different film than I thought it would be, albeit a much better film. It completely subverts genre conventions and plays with the dead carcass of those old thoughts. Plus, this is the best Nicolas Cage performance in DECADES. Hey Academy voters, nominate him you cowards!

11. RAGING FIRE – Donnie yen. Nicolas Tse. Abandoned church fight with a sledge hammer. You’re welcome.

12. DELIVER US FROM EVIL – Operatic violence only the way the eastern hemisphere can deliver these days.

13. BOILING POINT – Single camera shot drama about the owner/chef of a restaurant on a busy night. Stephen Graham is one helluva actor.

14. THE HAND OF GOD – From the director of “The Italian Beauty.” More unbelievable Italian artistry on display by Sorrentino. Another one that snuck up on me.

15. THE HARDER THEY FALL – Jonathan Majors is poised to be a HUGE star. Great dialog. Great cast. Cool as fuck. Great time. Plus: Delroy Lindo!

16. DUNE – Yes I talked about the Lynch version earlier. I realize that wasn’t a great adaptation of the novel. This one is. Epic filmmaking from Denis Villeneuve.

17. VAL – I love Val Kilmer and I miss him being in movies. This was a true treat from one of my all-time favorite actors.

18. Roadrunner – I cried the day Bourdain died and I’m getting emotional typing these words now. I cannot understate how much of an inspiration Bourdain has always been for me. I miss him so much every single day.

19. GODZILLA VS KONG – Big dumb fun with just enough heart. A script that knows to just get out of the way and also that Kong should be a part of the emotional core of the film. What do you want me to say? I love Kong.

20. LAST NIGHT IN SOHO – A weird one for me. Super fun, messy movie. I dug it a lot but still probably my least favorite Edgar Wright film. I’m not dissing it because I’ve liked all of his work and he’s another filmmaker where my only question is: what’s next and where do I need to be?

21. THE SUICIDE SQUAD – James Gunn cracks me the fuck up. He just does. I’m laughing right now thinking about the animation of how King Shark runs. It’s fucking hilarious. I laughed so hard, like three minutes in that I missed the next five minutes. Plus, it’s now spawned the Peacemaker show and that one is pure chaotic joy.

22. CANDYMAN – I like this one. Very pretty to look at. Felt like a cool idea for a legacy sequel.

23. COPSHOP – The attitude on display makes up for anything else this film might lack. Carnahan can be hit or miss for me but this was a definite hit. A good, old fashioned, 70s throwback of a stupid action flick. It’s good.

24. OLD HENRY – Another western? Hell yeah, another good one. I will beat the drum of Stephen Dorff until I die. He fucking rules and he’s a great villain here. Another good, old fashioned film.

25. WEREWOLVES WITHIN – Sam Richardson is one of the funniest people on the planet. He’s currently killing it on After Party for AppleTV+. Formerly killing it on Veep and Detroiters and anything else he’s been in. This is a cool, silly, sarcastic as shit, funny movie.

That’s the top twenty five. And now for fifteen more I enjoyed (in alphabetical order so you know I went to school and shit).

Antlers, Belfast, Don’t Look Up, No Sudden Move, No Time To Die, North Hollywood, Shang-Chi, Small Engine Repair, The Beta Test, The Card Counter, The Guilty, The Last Duel, The Matrix Resurrections, The Super Bob Einstein Movie, Vacation Friends.

I’m tired now. I’ve wasted enough of your time. I’m gonna go do something else now. Next week…I don’t know…I’ll figure something out. Until then, love each other.

David Lynch Friday #1 – Eraserhead

Eraserhead. Been awhile. Like much of Lynch’s work, Erasherhead benefits from time and exposure. The more time you spend with the film, the more you will get out of it. This was Lynch’s feature film debut, way back in 1977 and in the spirit of total honesty, it’s a miracle anyone saw this film and then decided to give Lynch money to make a second feature. This isn’t a knock on the film, it’s a wonderfully complex work and supremely assured for a debut feature but the film is also a nightmarish puzzle box. It is not easily digestible and at times it’s even a bit offensive to the senses. Lynch is challenging his audience right out of the starting gate, a trait that will never abandon him.

Watching it again now, after Lynch was able to revisit Twin Peaks, it’s clear that there is a lot here that either exists in the same universe of Twin Peaks or at least the universe of the Black Lodge. Erasherhead will be a major talking point when we wrap this project up with the sure-to-be massive post featuring everything Twin Peaks. For reference:

The apartment lobby floor is the same as the Black Lodge.
Electricity is prominently displayed throughout the film.
The electric, old-fashioned humidifier looks a lot like Phillip Jeffries.
The tree growing in Henry’s apartment looks exactly like THE ARM from the Black Lodge.
There is also a small photo of an atomic bomb explosion next to Henry’s bed.

So yeah, we will be revisiting all of this because I feel like I am on the verge of some new, mind blowing Twin Peaks revelations. But we will get back to that at a later date.

One of the themes of Erasherhead is that of parenthood and specifically fatherhood. The opening scene with Henry’s face superimposed over some kind of cosmic egg is an easy to grasp metaphor for the paranoia of parenthood. Lynch loves the technique of superimposing and still uses it to this day as a filmmaker. Jack Nance also has a face made for closeups — I swear it’s as malleable as clay. It says, “what have I done?” This could also be Lynch working through his feelings on birthing an idea and creating life in art.

An undervalued aspect of Lynch’s work is how funny it often is. Erasherhead is full of body horror and psychological torment but it’s also hilariously uncomfortable. Lynch uses black and white photography to cloak the film in shadow, like there is a looming, negative force overseeing everything. This also serves to exude a silent film vibe. It’s like if Charlie Chaplin were cast in Nosferatu. I love this. The dinner scene where Henry visits his girlfriend’s family is uproariously creepy. Everything is there to be considered normal but it’s all heightened enough to be off. The catatonic grandmothers cigarette. The tiny chickens and enormous carving knife. Then comes the blood. Then comes the tiny chicken seizures. Later on, Henry literally loses his head and some kid runs over and steals the severed head. Again, wild and hilarious. The kid then sells the head to the pencil factory where they turn it into a literal eraser head. I am not making this up.

So, what could this all mean?

There is more than just a singular theme — this is true for all of Lynch’s work. Sure it’s about fatherhood but it goes deeper. It touches on how children are our soul transferred into a new being all while being born of our own faults and demons. It’s also about how alien-like babies are and Lynch establishes this in the most heightened way possible. Lynch is also commenting on nature versus industry. We are inundated with images of machinery and general industry encroaching on and diminishing nature. Lynch then gives us plenty of background scenery depicting nature attempting to reclaim its place by invading the characters’ homes.

This brings me to one final conclusion: Erasherhead is very spiritual. Lynch drives us through an intense white light and I think he’s depicting how birth and death are the same. He then pushes us through a soupy mess and into a puddle that turns into a black hole. This is him differentiating between duty and desire — daily life and intense lust. I’ve also contemplated the possibility that the barnacled man is Henry’s grown-up son who has trapped his father in some kind of nightmare purgatory of his own creation. It’s like an eternity being forced to live through all of your own failings.

In the end I think that part of the film is Henry’s subconscious shown to us as real life. Henry is full of self doubt and this is best represented by the baby. The infant is a slimy, hideous creature who resembles ET in the worst possible way. Here’s the thing: the baby doesn’t actually look like how we see it. The baby is a manifestation of Henry’s self doubt. Parents worry, especially with newborns, that there is something wrong with their child. Their baby is different in a bad way. It’s a trick the mind plays on its subject. This is where Erasherhead leaves us, with Henry attempting to free his child by murdering it — killing his self doubt. Lynch hits out at life as an all encompassing process.

Birth. Life. Failure. Sex. Duty. Murder. Death.

Next week, The Elephant Man. Until then, love each other.

Gilliam Friday #9 – The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus

We can’t dig in to the next film on the list without, again, beating the Quixote drum. I now see just how much Gilliam was reeling from the destroyed project that consumed him for nearly a decade. He had previously tried to shake himself loose from his rut by taking on two projects so close together that they were released in the same year. The first, Brothers Grimm, was unfocused and messy. The second, Tideland, was the darkest material Gilliam had tackled. It felt more like an exorcism than a full fledged film. Now, four years later, I found him still trying to work through the pain of his failed magnum opus.

What should also be noted is how the production of The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus ran into trouble at every turn. First there was the death of actor Heath Ledger during principal photography, then upon completion, a producer died, and then during post production, Gilliam himself was hit by a car. This film still getting made and released is a small miracle in and of itself.

Onto the reason we’re together today, the 2009 film, The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus.

It tells the story of an aging conman/magician/mystical person named Doctor Parnassus who is really more of a gambler. He is constantly engaging in bets with the devil, losing those bets and doubling down to try and dig himself out of a hole. At first, he won and was granted immortality. He quickly realized that immortality was not all he thought it to be and made a new deal to be granted youth so he could be with the woman he loved. The payment was that if he ever had a child, at the age of sixteen, that child would become property of the devil. The film begins only a few short days before Parnassus’ daughter’s sixteenth birthday.

Parnassus, his daughter, and two assistants have been relegated to performing in their own traveling sideshow where they attempt to trick people into passing through their magic mirror. Once inside the mirror, the person is now inside of Parnassus’ imagination. Of course, what they see and experience is also partly dictated by their own imagination. It’s here that they will then be given a choice between two locations — one represents Parnassus’ theory on life while the other represents the devil. Parnassus struggles to find people who don’t succumb to the devil’s promises and thus is digging himself even deeper.

One night, they happen upon a hanging man beneath a London bridge and rescue the man. He’s played by Heath Ledger and has no memory of his previous life. The film really takes off from here as Ledger joins the troupe as a thank you for saving him. He is wonderful in this film — a natural con artist full of exuberance, wit and charm. With Tony’s help, Parnassus begins to gain the upper hand with the devil and just may be able to pull off one last wager and save the soul of his daughter.

Up to this point in the film, there are a few things to note. First, the imagination on display is second to none. Gilliam is fully in his wheelhouse. The monks’ snow covered temple, for example, is extraordinary. Again, Gilliam is giving us a vision only he could give, warts and all. Like many of his previous films, it takes a little while for the tone to settle and gel but we get there — Gilliam, like many auteurs, forces you to buy in to his vision and leave your own shit at the door. The material again is on the darker side. Many of the scenes and dialog and actions toward the daughter, Valentina, are problematic. She’s only sixteen and this does lead to some uncomfortable moments. Gilliam knew this and framed it around the devil’s wishes to soften, or at least explain, the questionable antics. There’s also a moment of blackface in the film which has no business being there. There is simply no excuse for it. It was done to serve a joke but the punchline is not worth a second of the journey taken to get there. So, the film is definitely an imperfect film.

Now, as I’m watching, I’m still digging the film because it’s really about the world each of us holds inside our mind. It’s around the halfway point where LEdger’s character, Tony, first enters the mirror. The result propels the second half of the film ever higher than its setup. It’s also where we first get a glimpse of the genius idea Gilliam had to get the film finished despite his lead actor’s death. He gathered a few of Ledger’s friends to play the late actor’s role. Tony goes into the mirror on three separate occasions and the mirror world inside Parnassus’ mind changes Tony’s face. The first time this happens, Ledger transforms into Johnny Depp. This is the shortest of changes and also the least effective. I love Depp. He’s one of my all time favorites and was brilliant in Fear and Loathing. Here, he plays Tony with a smirk and a wink. It’s more brooding and a little off from Ledger’s take. The second time Tony enters, he transforms into Jude Law. This is the best alternate version of Tony. Where Depp did his own thing, Law matches Ledger’s tone and nervous energy. It’s a damn near perfect match. It’s also our longest look inside the mirror world. I remember thinking that Gilliam should’ve been the one to make a live film version of Alice in Wonderland. He’s always been in love with Lewis Carroll and has paid homage to the writer on countless occasions. You could make the case that this film is his version of Alice in Wonderland. It’s equal parts whimsy, moral fable, and nasty legend. The final time Tony enters the mirror, he transforms into Colin Farrell. This is where we finally see Tony for the bastard he truly is and Farrell is good, not great. The problem here is that Colin Farrell has too kind a face. It’s just hard to buy in that he sucks as a human being. He manages to pull it off but barely.

The entire film is wonderfully absurd but it also begs the question of whether Gilliam has problems with women. Here, Valentina is constantly objectified as a sixteen year old and serves mostly as a plot device. Her plight propels the narrative forward but she doesn’t really hold any other weight. This is what holds me back just a bit from the film. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a very good film but some tweaks to the script could’ve landed Gilliam firmly back on his feet. The more I searched my feelings on this film, I came to realize that Valentina and Parnassus specifically are stand-ins for The Man Who Killed Don Quixote and Gilliam himself. This story is really about an old man questioning his choices and loyalties on the eve of losing what he cherishes most.

The film is visually extraordinary and brimming with ideas — perhaps too many ideas. It’s dark, daunting, and proves Gilliam’s tenacity as a filmmaker. It won’t win any converts but it shows an artist willing to try and dig himself out of a hole that has consumed him for over a decade.

Next week, The Zero Theroem. Until then, love each other.

Ramy Season 2 – An American Tale

Hulu has something special on their hands with Ramy. We’re two seasons in and I don’t think anyone who has seen the show is feeling patient about a third season — we want it now. The show has created such a unique blend of comedy and drama that it’s quickly established itself as a breath of fresh air. There is nothing else quite like it, save for Atlanta. It’s in these two shows that we can better understand America, it’s failings and the great promise that it still holds.

The first two episodes of season 2 give us a sobering look at what happens when we forget about our soldiers once they’ve returned home from war. Ramy finds himself at a spiritual crossroads and he’s desperately seeking not only guidance but also affirmation that he’s a good person. He helps this soldier who at first is ignorant of the Islamic faith while also condemning the religion and its followers because of the horrors he experienced fighting overseas. Ramy brings him to the man he seeks guidance from, played by Marshala Ali. The soldier, begins to see the humanity and good spirits of these people, his new friends and ultimately decides that he wants to convert to Islam. It’s here where things get dicey. Their place of worship is under constant protest from others who are still ignorant of the teachings of Islam. The soldier cannot abide this and attacks one of the protestors. The nuance involved in creating these scenes is nothing short of extraordinary. In a few moments, Ramy has shown us all sides of the argument — presented to us for examination and hopefully introspection.

The show eschews plot in favor of digging as deep as possible into all of the characters we meet. Ramy may be the title character but we are treated to whole episodes devoted to supporting characters. The show focuses on his sister Deena, his mother Maysa, his father Farouk and even his uncle Naseem. This is an effective tool in building the world from the inside out. It expands the show’s horizons and ours as well. Deena struggles with growing up while not only being Muslim but also a young woman in a doubly hostile world. Maysa struggles with her place in life and this pull from a part of herself that so badly wants to be helpful — even when she’s being increasingly offensive. Farouk is lost for much of the season as a man who has always supported his family and now being jobless. He’s being affronted by his own brand of chauvinism and ends up being rescued by a rescue dog. Farouk’s story in particular was a real treat this season. Then we have the brash and incredibly offensive Uncle Naseem. This season reveals that Naseem is a closeted gay man which illuminates his daily outward persona as a beard of the highest order.

We root for these people to find their way and the show walks a delicate balance between maintaining what is true to oneself while changing just a little bit in order to better fit in with today’s society.

Notice how Ramy himself hasn’t even come up yet? His story of course runs throughout the season but he is so lost and nearly beyond hope. He’s suffering from undiagnosed depression while constantly trying to fill the void with either sex or pats on the back. He doesn’t just want to get better and be better but he also needs to be told that he is better. It’s tough to watch. He gets so many things right but never quite addresses his lack of stakes in anything he attempts. Ramy’s problem is that he lets himself off the hook at every turn. He’s in love with his cousin and eventually cheats on his fiancée the night before his wedding. This is all horrendously selfish but upon the end of his wedding night, having gone through with his marriage and even taking his new wife’s virginity, he decides to come clean. It’s the single most fucked up slide into wrongheadedness that Ramy has ever engaged in. Mahershala Ali, Ramy’s now father in law, shows up the next morning and brutally takes Ramy to task. He’s so overcome with grief and anger that he almost physically hits Ramy. It is a testament to his inner strength that he withholds and leaves Ramy to his own dark thoughts.

I will always applaud a story that is unafraid to take its main character to task for their failings. There’s never any room for hero worship — that train of thought breeds bad stories. Here, Ramy reels from his family’s cutting remarks, to his wife leaving, to his brutal take down at the hands of his father in law, to the even more brutal take down at the hands of his cousin. Ramy ends up alone in the abandoned, shit covered car left by the homeless soldier he tried to help earlier in the season. He’s adrift with nowhere to turn. It’s sad but deserved. I, for one, cannot wait for season 3 to see if Ramy can pull himself out of this whole he has put himself in.

Ramy provides us as American a story as can be. One full of humor and drama in equal measure, just like our own daily lives.

Next week, let’s tackle Edward Norton’s film adaptation of Motherless Brooklyn. Until then, love each other.

Gilliam Friday #7 – Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas

Holy hell. This one was wild. I knew it, sort of. Like many of Gilliam’s films, it had been quite awhile since I last saw Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas. I liked it then and I like it even more now. Gilliam is just showing off with this film. Every single aspect is firing on all cylinders. Reading about all of the behind the scenes trouble that permeated the entire production is absolute bananas when the finished product came out this polished.

The film is based on Hunter S. Thompson’s semi-autobiographical novel of the same name. It took years of development to arrive at the point where they could actually begin filming this thing. Johnny Depp, for his role as Hunter/Raoul Duke, lived with Thompson for four months. He studied the writer’s habits and mannerisms. Nearly all of the clothes and props that Depp wears/uses in the film are actual items that Thompson owned. Depp even bought the red convertible and drove it non-stop before filming began. Hell, Thompson himself shaved Depp’s head to match his own male pattern baldness.

The film itself never lets up. If you’re in, you must be in all the way. I’ve never seen a film that made the viewer feel higher and more off balance in my life. It is exhausting. As Duke and Gonzo spiral further into madness we spiral along with them, looking for anything we can hold onto that will keep us tethered to our own sanity.

Gilliam’s trademark use of deep focus shots and extreme Dutch angles is more effective in this film than any other film of his to date. Where The Fisher King and Twelve Monkeys may be better overall films, I’d argue that Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas is Gilliam’s most accomplished effort as a director. I cannot imagine anyone else in the world being able to pull this off and tell Thompson’s story in Thompson’s way. There are narration passages that are so stunningly beautiful they feel like the words of God. These asides are also refreshing for us, the viewer, as a welcome respite from the drug fueled mayhem. It’s when the film goes introspective that it elevates itself to masterpiece territory. It perfectly and beautifully captures the haunting mania of Thompson’s writing. This is important because if you’re looking for a plot-centric story, this is not for you. The film wants nothing to do with plot and everything to do with studying a fugue state. Like I said at the top, You have to be in all the way.

My notes I took during the film (I watched it 2-1/2 times in three days) make no sense. I couldn’t help but laugh as I sifted through all of the WTF’s and underlined words like: insane, nuts, lol, what the actual fuck, etc. As a comedy, the film works. It is insanely hilarious and Depp gives one of the best performances of his career. He delivers his lines like a typewriter punching words onto a page. It’s perfect in its deadpan delivery of madness. Gilliam counters the deadpan delivery by using his camera like a drug addict along for the ride. It is never quite stable and makes us feel as high as Duke and Gonzo.

Speaking of Gonzo, Benicio Del Toro hovers over every scene like a devil on Duke’s shoulder. He’s constantly egging him on to further depravity. I wonder if Gonzo even really exists or if he’s the ego to Duke’s Id or vice versa. They both tell the same stories about each other and it often leads to hilariously uncomfortable results.

We could go further into the guts of the film and examine some of the outrageously over the top moments like the reptile hallucination or the flying Fellinis or the entire circus for that matter. Even Depp’s walk is outrageous. In lesser hands, this could all have devolved into indigestible bullshit but Gilliam fully commits and convinces everyone involved to join him. What we get out of the deal is a special film that has more than aged well and can provide many different types of film lovers something to chew on. Unless you’re that business man who happened upon Duke and a stranger in a bathroom doing lsd off the sleeve of his flannel. If you’re that guy, you’re life is ruined for having the curtain pulled back on a life you didn’t know existed.

The only bad thing about this film is that it marks the end of Gilliam’s prime. A prime that spanned thirteen years and five films. Upon this film’s release, Gilliam began shooting the Man Who Killed Don Quixote, a film that would plague him for twenty nine years and rob him of the momentum he had as an artist. From this point on, he struggled to regain it and we’ll see that in the next few weeks. There is always a story to tell. We’re in the second half now but there is still some wonderful places to go.

Next week, a double feature with The Brothers Grimm and Tideland. Until then, love each other.

DEVS – Alex Garland’s Brilliant Look Into Past Trauma And Our Impending Future

I am a huge fan of Alex Garland. I have always found his writing to be thought provoking and invigorating. 28 Days Later is one of my favorite horror films of all time and his novel, Coma, is one I re-read on a regular basis. He has broken into directing in the last decade and it comes as no surprise to me that he’s quickly established himself as a clear and unique voice in Hollywood. Dredd rocked and Ex Machina blew the world away. With Annihilation, he deftly adapted the first book of Jeff VanderMeer’s astonishing Area X trilogy into one of the best films of 2018.

Now that we have that out of the way we can get down to the meat of this post. Devs.

Devs is a tv show Alex Garland wrote and directed in its entirety. It aired earlier this year on FX and is easily a landmark achievement in not only science fiction but any genre of storytelling.

What’s so great about it? Everything. I’m not going to dive into many details about the plot because anyone willing to take this journey should do so as blind as possible. It is set at some point in our future where automation has taken over our lives. Tech has evolved to the point that it has caused unemployment to spike up to sixty percent. We live in an age where we are beginning to see the future Garland is showing us as a possible real thing. This is scary. This is also merely window dressing in this rich and rewarding story.

The real story is about a young woman who works for a giant tech company and investigates the disappearance and questionable suicide of her boyfriend, who happens to work at the same company. There is a secret project called Devs and what exactly they are up to is the central mystery of this series. Do we get answers? Yes we do and they are so much more profound than we could possibly imagine. This series rocked me to my core. It plays like a conspiracy thriller when it is actually using that to mask a story about trauma and grief. Devs is a slow burn that peels back layer after layer until we lose all sense of direction. It is a work of astounding confidence and brilliant ideas. We’ve seen works in the past that could execute one of these things but not all of them quite like this. It not only sticks the landing, it changes everything.

The young woman is played by Sonoya Mizuno, an actress about to hopefully become a household name. Garland loves her — he’s cast her in Ex Machina and Annihilation already and here he totally lets her loose. She is amazing — with a face that could tell a thousand stories.

Side note: She was also incredible in Netflix’s Maniac.

We also have Nick Offerman playing the co-lead as the head of this tech company. He is manipulative and borderline evil but is also suffering great loss while maintaining some type of humanity. It’s strange to find his presence and voice so comforting no matter what is happening on screen. The bottom line is that he is a man determined to play out the only hand he believes he has. There is a sort of twisted nobility in this.

All of the characters in the series are fully realized with motivations of their own. This is vital for a story like this — we have to care no matter what. I’m going to have to cut this relatively short because the more I write, the more I run the risk of spilling the beans. I don’t want to do that to anyone.

I will say this: the finale turns everything upside down and around again. Just when you think you have this figured out, Garland ups the intelligence ante and takes you where you secretly wanted to go — without you realizing you wanted it all along. I will die on the hill proclaiming this one of the greatest finales in television history and one of the most profound and deeply moving endings to a story, ever.

Hit print.

Next week, either Tom Hardy or Tales from the Loop — we’ll see. Until then, love each other.

Gilliam Friday #3 – Brazil

Here we are in week three of the Gilliam project and we’ve already had some surprises. This week, however, no surprise with Brazil and its genius. This is a film I check in on every few years and like other high-level art, it is a film that strikes me as more relevant than ever.

Brazil stars Jonathan Pryce as Sam Lowry, a middle-of-the-road office worker for the totalitarian Ministry of Information. Gilliam begins the proceedings showing us another worker hunting down a bug, killing it, and creating a misprint on a docket labeling an innocent man as a threat to society. They are after a known terrorist named Tuttle (played by a game Robert DeNiro) but instead arrest a man named Buttle. The innocent man is tortured and accidentally killed because his heart condition wasn’t disclosed on the other man’s medical history. This is clarified in a hilariously inept exchange between Sam and a friend who happens to be the torturer. It is an indictment on the increasingly bureaucratic tendencies of modern government. All anyone does is blame another department, create fixes that break more things and eventually try and quiet dissenters.

We first meet Sam in the midst of a fantastical dream. While asleep, Sam sees himself as a majestic winged warrior, fighting monsters in order to save the damsel in distress. His dreams are shot with Sam mostly attacking from above, lending an air of superiority. This is in stark contrast to his real life which is mundane and small — with an overbearing mother to boot. Sam is content in his life until he sees an image of the woman he has been dreaming of. This sets Sam off on an adventure to find this literal woman of his dreams. The woman in question was a neighbor of Buttle and is searching for what happened to the innocent man. Sam gets wrapped up in her quest while also dealing with the real terrorist, Tuttle, who pops up every now and again to help Sam out of a pickle. These small events in particular are key in understanding where Gilliam is ultimately going with the story.

Gilliam has constructed two worlds in this film, one of majestic beauty, while the other is a hulking dystopia. Sam feels powerful in the world of his dreams and Pryce portrays him as calm and confident. The real world is where Pryce truly shines by playing Sam as a smallish yet determined man full of nervous energy. He so desperately wants a win and to do something that truly matters. He’s willing to go the distance. In a wonderful twist, Sam is actually way more heroic in the real world. Gilliam loads up the real world with trope imagery. All office workers look and dress the same, managers are the same, assistants are the same, kids all are the same — you see where I’m going with this. The society is beholden to the technology they crave — TVs and radios are everywhere. In classic Gilliam fashion, the future again looks antiquated. We quickly realize how this film represents a perfect marriage of material and artist. Gilliam has always had an adversarial relationship with authority and Brazil is a commentary on this aspect of society — it is also so much more. Gilliam is also rubbing our faces in our own fascist relationship with technology. The more we seek the comfort and ease of tech, the quicker and easier we become a slave to it. Is tech a stand-in for God?

Gilliam blasts out of the gates on fire. His camera creates terror, confusion and paranoia in nearly every scene. It is constantly chaotic and hilariously absurd. This is also the director’s most focused film to this point in his career. He bought in and the film is instantly laser focused. Another thing of note is the whimsical, musical sensibility Gilliam instills in the real world setting. This creates a perfect and telling rhythm to the film and Gilliam never loses it here. Everything works like a finely tuned piece of machinery from start to finish.

It’s important for Gilliam to maintain total control as the narrative spirals into madness. The stakes get higher and Sam’s fantasy dream world begins to blend into the real world. I feel like Brazil was a major influence for the film, Being John Malkovich. With that said, there is still more to unpack with the film because it would stand as a classic without even delving into the twist of the finale. Eventually, Sam is captured and before he can be tortured, he is rescued by Tuttle and other insurgents. Sam and Tuttle are chased with Tuttle literally disappearing in a storm of loose papers. The chase for Sam continues as his dream world and real world fully blend together. Sam is then confronted and chased by his own failures as a man and by every facet of society he has thus far faced. Gilliam is showing us that middle age is a confrontation of what happens if you give up on your dreams — you’re destined to be imprisoned by your own shortcomings. This is the cost of what we give up in order to join the rat race instead of chasing the wants and hopes of our youth. Sam is confronted by his mother who, through plastic surgery, now looks just like the woman from Sam’s dreams. Sam then disappears into a void and ends up rescued by his dream woman — rescued by love.

Except he isn’t rescued at all. Sam is last seen having been captured and lobotomized — destined to live out his days in the bliss of a manufactured simpleton.

What does it all mean?

I’ll stake my flag right here saying that Sam was actually Tuttle all along. The Tuttle we saw represented by DeNiro was never really there, nor was the woman of Sam’s dreams. No, Sam was captured early on and tortured in order for the Ministry of Information to maintain control. This is a sour ending to a visually joyous film but it’s also a profound lesson for us to learn about how delusion can alter our perception of even the simplest of things. Gilliam hit one out of the park with Brazil, one of his best films, and one of the most inventive films Hollywood has seen. I loved it my whole life and I love it even more now.

Next Friday is the day for the Baron. Until then, love each other.

The Last Of Us Part II – Love, Hate, And The World In Between

Love and hate are separated by an invisible barrier. The world of, The Last Of Us, makes this clear. These feelings we all have are seemingly polar opposites but in reality, they are boxed in with nothing but tissue paper. Love and hate are both irrational feelings that we cannot completely control — no matter how hard we may try. We learn to live with both of them and make the best life we can. Some of us are taught to give in to love while others are taught to be led by hate. The quicker we realize the lack of control we have over life, the quicker we can exist peacefully somewhere in the middle. Life is not easy and the only thing we have to hold onto is that precarious ledge our emotions keep us tap dancing on.

I played TLOU2, weaving through a post-apocalyptic landscape, while also playing hide-and-seek with my feelings. To sum up, it was a harrowing and unforgettable experience. I finished, put down the controller, re-joined the world, and then immediately returned for a second run. I wasn’t done sorting through myself and what this story had to offer. I was always going to write about this game but I’ve realized that I need to do this now because I cannot function as a writer with this story still churning up my brain. There is no way for me to properly discuss this story without diving into ***MASSIVE SPOILERS***, so be warned: I am going to talk about it all. I urge you to return to this post at a later date if you have any plans to play this game. This post will still be here.

Again, MASSIVE SPOILERS AHEAD

Okay

You’ve been warned — let’s dive in.

FIRST, SOME CONTEXT

The story of the original was about a fourteen year old girl, born years after society fell to a destructive virus, journeying across the country in order to reach a hospital. She was immune to the virus and was the only person known to be immune. This girl, Ellie, grew up without much of a family. She was entrusted to a smuggler named Joel for this journey. Joel was a man who watched his young daughter get murdered at the onset of the outbreak. This event broke him and forged an armor around him. Over the course of their journey, Ellie and Joel became a family — the first ever family for Ellie and the first in decades for Joel. Upon reaching the hospital and finding out that Ellie would have to die in surgery in order to potentially create a cure for the virus, Joel snapped. He could not abide losing another daughter. Joel, through grief, slaughtered the entire hospital in a bid to save Ellie. He left with her and when she asked what happened, he lied and told her there was no cure — that everything was a failure. That story ended with Ellie sighing and saying, “okay.” You could see in her eyes that she knew Joel was lying about something but she let that hang for the time being.

That game was revolutionary in the way that it flipped our perception of the hero, Joel. The player ended up complicit in Joel’s despicable acts. His actions were borne from love and grief with a heavy dose of selfishness. To this day, I don’t agree with Joel’s actions but I know that I would have done the same.

ONWARD TO THE MAIN EVENT

I could also spend thousands of words discussing the game mechanics and how they’ve evolved in the years since the first game. I could write about the verticality of the environments, the free flowing combat, streamlined crafting, and the beautiful guitar mini-game (you should YouTube what some people are doing with this mini-game, it is extraordinary).These are all used effectively to further immerse us in this world. The camera is visceral and only shows us the bare minimum at any given moment, which keeps the tension at a maximum. The world is dangerous like I have never experienced before. Every single enemy interaction is brutal, nasty, and leaves the player feeling at sea. The 3D audio, ratchets everything up further, with creaks, clicks, groans, gurgles, roars, gasps, screams, gunfire and the like coming from all, yet singularly specific, directions.

WE BEGIN WITH A GUT PUNCH

The sequel begins in Jackson, the rebuilt town Ellie and Joel returned to at the very end of the first game. They’ve settled into a routine and life is mostly peaceful. Through dialog, we understand that Joel and Ellie aren’t on the best of terms. Ellie, now nineteen and very much her own person, is still grappling with the fallout from the events at the hospital nearly four years prior. She heads out on patrol with her girlfriend Dina when they get waylaid by a snowstorm. They soon find out that Joel and his brother Tommy aren’t responding to radio calls and so Ellie heads out to find them. This is when we change perspective and begin playing as a new character named Abby. We don’t know who she is or what she and her group are doing here but we quickly realize they’re here for Joel. We can infer that she must have a connection to the group from the hospital and we begin to fear the worst. At the same time, this make sense because when you flip a coin, there is always a tails to the heads. The people Joel killed out of his love for Ellie would also have their own people willing to do the same for them. Abby is quickly beset by a horde and is rescued by, of all people, Joel and Tommy. They escape the horde and end up at an abandoned mansion Abby and her group have been holed up in. This is where things get dark. Joel realizes these people know who he is and there is no good reason for that. Before either Joel or Tommy can react, they are attacked — Tommy knocked out and Joel taking a shotgun blast to his legs. Abby then proceeds to beat Joel with a golf club.

We regain control of Ellie again as she reaches the mansion, sneaks in, hears the commotion in the basement and rushes into action. We expect to save the day but are horrified when Ellie is immediately bested and held down as Joel’s torture continues. She calls out to Joel and begs him to get up. And then Abby kills him. It made me sick to my stomach. I wasn’t upset that Joel died because in this harsh world, it’s not exactly surprising when someone doesn’t die of old age. The thing that got to me was Ellie’s pain — it was primal in the most horrible and wrenching manner. Abby leaves Ellie alive because her mission is finished and because, as we will learn later, the cycle of love and hate demand it. Now, I’m not going to rehash the entire plot of this game because that would take forever and also it’s not necessary. The plot is secondary to character and I’ve spoken at great length on my site about my preference for stories told this way. It’s not the what but the why.

THE HERO OF ONE STORY CAN OFTEN BE THE VILLAIN OF ANOTHER.

This is an obvious theme and one we get dosed with early on in the game. What none of us expected was how this story would deepen our understanding of this theme as the rest of the events unfold. We play the first half of the game as Ellie on her odyssey of revenge. She is going to punish those responsible for Joel’s death. We find out quick that Joel’s brother Tommy is already on the same quest for his own satisfaction. What we’re shown over the next dozen hours or so of game is Ellie losing the rational and human pieces of herself. She falls down the rabbit hole because of love and drowns in a pool of hate. She has no room for anything else. She is vicious, cruel, and undeterred by anything. She’s joined by her girlfriend Dina, and later, her friend Jesse. We watch as Ellie begins to unravel and even lose sight of the relationships she holds so dear — the same feelings and connections which bore so much love and happiness to begin with. Ellie kills her way all over Seattle as she fights the militarized group known as the WLF, (aka wolves), the group Abby is a part of. Ellie also has violent encounters with another group of “enemies” known as the Seraphites. They are a group of religious zealots who mainly fight the WLF over territory and philosophy of life. By the time Ellie and Abby confront one another again, we are numb to the killing and exhausted from it. We are in desperate need of catharsis.

BONDED FOR LIFE

Leading up to this point, the story is broken up by sections of Ellie remembering past events with Joel. They are mostly tender moments of the two of them strengthening their bond. Ellie never had a family and even though it isn’t biological, Joel is very much her father. They love each other like only the truest sense of family can love. Through these flashbacks, we begin to appreciate how Ellie could succumb to hate so fully. This in no way excuses her actions but given our perch and availability to be objective, we can be honest with ourselves in understanding that we could easily follow in Ellie’s footsteps. Like I said at the top, it is an invisible barrier. There’s further context that some later flashbacks reveal. Ellie always suspected Joel had lied about something. She revisits the hospital and finds out what happened. She questions Joel and later doesn’t let him off the hook, demanding the truth. Joel gives her what she asked and she hates him for it. Their relationship is seemingly severed. It’s just about the most upsetting thing I could think of, how irrational love can lead to equally irrational hate. Except Ellie finds the bond between her and Joel unable to be severed. We learn why guitars mean so much to her, Joel taught her how to play and it was something they both cherished. The guitar keeps her tethered to him and the love they have for each other. She needs this not just to fuel her rage but also as a lifeline protecting her from being completely consumed by the hate she feels. We don’t have to agree with her actions in order to empathize with them. She is in so much pain and it it hurts to see her like this. At first, we think her revenge is fueled by guilt because she wasn’t able to reconcile with Joel but we later learn that she went to Joel and told him she wanted to try and forgive him. They had reconciled. It then becomes obvious that guilt plays a different part in this story. Ellie wasted so much time hating a man she loved more than anything in this world. Ellie thought they had more time and was robbed of the only family she ever had. When Abby killed Joel, she killed a piece of Ellie’s heart.

TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN

After Ellie and Abby confront each other, we’re left with a cliffhanger. Abby has killed Jesse, Tommy is possibly dead on the floor, and her gun is trained on Ellie. Cut to black.

We then pick up with a flashback scene of Abby and her father. By the end of this flashback we learn that not only was Abby a part of the group at the hospital (the Fireflies) but that her father was the doctor responsible for creating a cure through Ellie. Joel killed him. This moment flips the entire story on its head. We suddenly have so much more insight into who Abby is as a person and what fueled her own rage. Abby spent the subsequent years with the WLF, receiving military training, and preparing for the day she could avenge her father’s murder. Like I said, the hero of one story…

What we learn over the next dozen hours, playing as Abby, is that she has her own family of friends. They care for each other. They are not that much different from the people of Jackson. Love leads to hate and the cycle continues. Abby becomes embroiled in a fight against the Seraphites and is nearly killed in horrific fashion by them until being saved by a couple of Seraphite outcasts. They bond, especially Abby and the young boy named Lev. This closely mirrors the relationship growth of Joel and Ellie from the first game. We begin the game hating Abby and end the game loving her because we understand her motives and pain. There is enough pain and suffering in this world that one’s sun could be blotted out by it. Abby gives in to her hate but as her story unfolds, love creeps back in and begins to take hold. We learn about her relationships with her friends, namely Owen, Mel, Manny, and Alice the dog. She lets Lev into her heart and begins to care about him as well. So when she finds out most of her friends are dead, the switch is primed. She watches Manny die right in front of her, killed by a revenge-fueled Tommy. She finds Alice, Mel, and Owen dead — then finds evidence it was Ellie. This sets Abby off once again on a quest for vengeance. She is now at odds with the WLF because she’s become so protective of Lev, a Seraphite. Abby is beset on all sides by people attempting to cause harm to her and those she loves. We also see that she cannot quite shake a bit of humanity because Lev has had such a remarkable influence on her mindset. She’s forever changed. These two women, Ellie and Abby, are so full of pain, it hurts us to see them bested by these feelings. Pain lends itself to hate by holding your hand and walking you to the threshold. Some find the strength to turn back while others give in to the false promise of catharsis.

We end up back at the cliffhanger moment and, playing as Abby, engage in a boss fight of sorts against Ellie. It puts us in a rocky boat as we’re fighting against the one person we’ve always fought for. Abby defeats Ellie but lets her live. This is different than the encounter early in the game because this is Abby again fueled by hate except she doesn’t allow it to fully consume her. Abby chooses to go live a peaceful life and warns Ellie to not come for her again. At a glance, this seems like a typical warning but when you dig deeper, it is more of a recognition of oneself in another. Abby now sees that her and Ellie are one and the same, sees the same hate but also the love. We come to realize that Abby’s warning is more philosophical. By the end of this section, the wolf has become the shepherd.

This all requires a mature understanding of life, what we hold dear, and the limits we are required to exceed. The only way out is through and when you’re walled in by love and hate, that particular hallway is a precarious jaunt. The game exemplifies this by repeated journeys down the same hallway as Abby and staircase as Ellie.

YOU GO. I GO. END OF STORY.

We can’t go further without discussing some of the side characters. This is part of what makes this story and world so rich and rewarding. Dina is Ellie’s girlfriend and after Joel, the most important person in her life. Dina supports Ellie but is also there to try and keep Ellie from being consumed by vengeance. In fact, Ellie’s darkest moments are when Dina is not around. There’s a saying: No man is an island. This is another theme TLOU2 deals with in depth. We are all made up of our friends and family. What I mean by that is that left to our own devices, each of us are not at our best. We are taught and continue to be taught, every day, by those we surround ourselves with. Dina teaches Ellie to see light in the darkness — she helps Ellie be the best possible version of herself. Where Ellie has Dina, Abby has Owen. This is particularly evident in Abby’s flashbacks where Abby and Owen run the gamut of blossoming love. In the present, they are no longer together, mostly because they remind each other of their hateful actions against Joel. They still have love for each other but it’s no longer enough to hold them together as a couple. Ellie relies on her loved ones to keep her away from the dark side while Abby shuts them out in order to protect them from her own darkness. It’s different but both women operate from a foundation of love. We then spend so much time with Lev. He is a stand-in for a younger Ellie. Abby becomes Joel and her change is brought about by a new understanding of what she, like Joel, would do for someone she primally needs to protect.

CATHARSIS

Ellie heeds Abby’s warning and is satisfied to live peacefully on a little farm she and Dina have set up. They’re raising a little boy together and also a flock of sheep. Ellie still suffers from PTSD over what happened to Joel. She doesn’t feel whole but is still willing to try and live this new life. A visit from a still alive but handicapped Tommy changes everything. Tommy has lost most of himself to hate. He is even angry with Ellie because she is unwilling to finish the job against Abby. We don’t want Ellie to listen to Tommy but she does and sets out one more time.

Ellie is desperately searching for the closure she can’t find — it is like an open wound. She tracks down Abby in California, only to discover she and Lev have been captured by a sadistic group of people who call themselves the Rattlers. They enslave anyone they find in order for themselves to live in comfort. They torture and crucify those who disobey. By the time Ellie reaches Abby, it’s been months. They travel along the beach together with Lev until they reach two boats. Abby and Lev are emaciated from their months of abuse while Ellie is in bad shape do to her being impaled earlier by a trap set by the Rattlers. They at first seem content to go their separate ways — Abby and Lev to Catalina Island and Ellie back home. Ellie sets her pack in the boat and sees a flash of Joel dead on that basement floor. She gives in to hate again and tells Abby they need to finish it. Abby says no because she’s seen what the cycle does and has made it out the other side. Ellie threatens Lev’s life and Abby capitulates in order to protect the only person she has left to love. They fight in the surf, brutally and ugly, until Ellie pins Abby’s head under water. It is then that another image of Joel flashes in her mind — Joel on his porch with his guitar. It’s the same moment when Ellie says she wants to try and forgive him. Ellie finally lets go and lets Abby and Lev go while she sobs in the water. The cycle is finally broken. We last see Ellie back at the farm, now abandoned, and she plays Joel’s guitar once last time before setting it down and beginning her trek back to Jackson — back to her family and back to love. She let the guitar go and with that she let Joel go. By being able to do this, she let the hate go and gave herself a better foundation to rebuild her life. It is an astonishing moment in a game/story brimming with astonishing moments. And it’s here where we gain further understanding of what the story has been telling us all along with some of its imagery. The opening screen is a boat in the water, we at first think this is representing the calm before the storm but ultimately reveals itself as a metaphor for the two leads being at sea. Once the game is finished, the opening screen changes to the boat beached on Catalina Island. Following this thread, we also realize that every loading screen we see is a lesson in searching for the light. Most of the screen is shrouded in darkness while a group of moths gather around the lone light source. We are all like the moths, desperately trying to flee the dark.

LOVE IS STRONGER THAN HATE

By the end of this story, we are left loving characters at odds with each other because their stories are largely like our own. Everyone has a story and everyone begins a new story every day. Most of us get the opportunity to change our lives for the better and try and leave this world better for it. I played the first game in a world where I had no children in my life. I still found it engrossing and one of the best stories ever told in a video game. There is a reason HBO has secured the rights in order to make it into a new series. Shortly after, my family began having children. I am now an Uncle to five girls and one boy and my entire world is different. Being around children is like being a time traveler — I get to watch them experience millions of things for the very first time. It reminds me of how I grew up and I am in constant reflection of my own experiences. I didn’t know I could possess the love in my heart that I now possess and both stories now hit harder. My understanding of this world has deepened and more importantly, I better understand the person I am and the person I want to be. I love Ellie and Abby because I see myself in them. I see them with people they love and who love them back — people they would go to the ends of the earth for and vice-versa. They are awkward around those they don’t know and can be easily consumed by their own feelings. These two brave and powerful women each found their light and I try every day to follow their lead. Great art cannot make the world a better place on its own, it can only take our hand and lead us to the threshold. It is up to us to choose the proper doorway. Just because love and hate share an invisible barrier doesn’t mean we’re destined to be lost.

Next week, it really is DEVS time. Until then, love each other.

First Reformed or The Diary Of Paul Schrader

I’m a year and a half late to this party but Paul Schrader’s film, First Reformed, is an astonishing work. It’s a terrifying vision of what can happen to us when we become overwhelmed by the negativity of the world. The film is sparse, somber, and chillingly effective. It’s the story of a small town preacher, dealing with his own issues, trying to help a couple expecting their first child. The man wants his wife to have an abortion because he is afraid to bring a child into the world. He’s an environmental activist who is bordering on becoming a terrorist. He’s seeking help but is unable to grapple with everything going on around him. He is lost. His wife is symbolic of purity of spirit. She is hope personified and only wants the man she fell in love with to come back to her. The wife is played perfectly by Amanda Seyfried. In retrospect, it is perfect casting. Her eyes are so expressive that we are pulled into her orbit, willing to help in any way we can.

The priest at the center of this film is barely holding on himself. He’s terminally ill and drinks his nights away while keeping a journal chronicling his struggles with his own faith and his own descent into depression. Ethan Hawke plays this priest and gives us a gift of a performance. He’s always been a phenomenal actor and this is his career best performance.

I’m not going to get into any more details of the plot because this film is one best discovered sight unseen. Allow it to envelop you in its embrace. Schrader has crafted something that is a high point of his own career — and that is saying a lot. Paul Schrader is an artist who has written four films for Martin Scorsese — he understands the balance of a film. The sound design is impeccable. We hear and feel every creak of the floorboards and we understand the age of this part of the country. His shot composition is that of a beautiful horror film. And one could make the argument that Schrader has indeed crafted a horror film. What’s more horrifying than losing one’s soul? Each shot unsettles and leaves us seeking the same comfort each of the characters are themselves seeking.

A unique aspect of Paul Schrader’s career is that he seemingly understands multiple generations. His films always feel timely. This is because Schrader loves to explore and experiment deep in the human psyche. I will go further and suggest that this film is borne of his own diary. I could suggest this of many of his films. His writing always feels urgent because he is always brutally honest. There is no fear in Schrader’s writing.

While watching this film, I took copious notes. The ideas and my thoughts and musings continued to pour out of me long after the film ended. I’ve wondered if the camera is representative of sanity. Is the camera God? Is it sitting in judgment of these characters? There’s a scene in the film which, the best way I can describe it, serves as a cosmic floating scene. Ethan Hawke floats into the cosmos and then through time. The scene goes cosmos, nature, man, destruction. Schrader isn’t mincing words here. First reformed would make for a great double billing with another film Schrader wrote, one of his Scorsese films, Taxi Driver. They explore similar themes albeit by taking different routes. I’ll leave you with this quote from the film: We know who speaks for big business but who speaks for God?

See you Wednesday and then Friday and then Monday, which is Honey Boy. Until then, love each other.